Getting ready to fly…

“Making The decision to have a child – it’s momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body” Elizabeth Stone

My daughter starts University at the end of September.

She has had an amazing Summer and has grown up so much in the last year.
She has had jobs, passed her driving test, been on holiday with her friends, danced till dawn at festivals and worked her socks off to get her A’levels.

She is ready to fly the nest.
It is time.
She needs to spread her wings and soar into the big wide world.
She is confident, excited, and ready to face new challenges.

Me ?

I embrace the future, I am excited for her, but part of my heart will be wandering around on the other side of the country, and at the moment that’s slightly messing with my head.

I have been fine, but when we were in the Lakes I couldn’t get to sleep.
Too much food, wine and caffeine and at 3.45a.m. precisely, it grabbed me unaware.

The sob.

Gently and without warning it rose from inside me.
Silent initially, but as I struggled against it, it became fiercer and I had no choice but to let it out and the tears poured down my face and dripped off the end of my nose.
Not a pretty sight.

Letting go is hard, but it is the natural next step (yada yada yada – these are all the things my rational mind keeps saying to me).

It just feels so weird and she hasn’t even gone yet.

Oh sorry guys, self-indulgent post or what? My chirpiness will be back to normal soon.

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20 thoughts on “Getting ready to fly…

  1. As I said you are allowed to feel like this, in fact I would be worried if you didn't feel this way.I am sure that you have empowered her to be the best she is and to learn to look after herself, but even so, nothing is going to take away that concern

  2. I cried buckets when my daughters went to Uni. I thought having gone through it once with the eldest I would be better with the youngest but of course wasn't. Now 5 years later it's great having them home again but miss having my own space.Gillx

  3. I loved this post. So emotional. My daughter is only 5 but I'm already dreading this day. Part of me longs for her to travel the world and do lots of exiting things while the other part wants her to live at home for ever! Letting go must be so difficult. x

  4. It just says to me what a wonderful mum you are. This time next year my little one will be starting school for the first time… I shall feel much as you do now, I don't doubt.

  5. Aw have a hug. I agree with Steve's comments – shows how full of love you are. Nurturing, teaching, guiding and knowing when to let your little one fly the nest and test her wings!

  6. I've just had a lump in my throat reading this, your choice of words is beautiful!!! She will be fine, she's a strong Lil lady just like her gorgeous mum and will make friends with ease!

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